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autor |
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fredd
Kreisi kasutaja
liitunud: 03.12.2003
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04.02.2004 14:58:57
Microsoft help desk :D |
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leidsin sellise huvitava teksti Ikka naerma ajab
Here are some conversations, from Microsoft, which had actually taken place between help desk people and their customers:
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Customer: "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to print a document, but the computer won't boot properly."
Tech Support: "What does it say?"
Customer: "Something about an error and non-system disk."
Tech Support: "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"
Customer: "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel inside."
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Tech Support: "Just call us back if there's a problem. We're open 24 hours."
Customer: "Is that Eastern time?"
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Tech Support: "Ok, now click your left mouse button."
Customer: (silence) "But I only have one mouse."
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Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote'click'."
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Customer: "I received the software update you sent,but I am still getting the same error message."
Tech Support: "Did you install the update?"
Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?"
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Customer: "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."
Tech Support: "Tell me what you've done."
Customer: "I typed 'A:SETUP'."
Tech Support: "Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it says."
Customer: "It says '[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk'."
Tech Support: "Insert the MS Word setup disk."
Customer: "What?"
Tech Support: "Did you buy MS word?"
Customer "No..."
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Customer: "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
Tech Support: ?@#$ < mailto:?@#$ > ?
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Tech Support: "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"
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Tech Support: "What type of computer do you have?"
Customer: "A white one."
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Tech Support: "Type 'A:' at the prompt."
Customer: "How do you spell that?"
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Tech Support: "Is your computer on a separate telephone line?"
Customer: "No." (clicks the button to log on to our service)
Tech Support: "Well then we can't-"
Customer: "It says 'no dial tone'."
Tech Support: "That's because you're on the line with me right now.You need to-"
Customer: "No, that's not it. It does this all the time. I just have to try a few times, and it will let me through."
Tech Support: "No, ma'am. It's not even trying to dial right now because you're on the phone with me."
Customer: "It must be busy. I'll try again later."
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Tech Support: "What's on your screen right now?"
Customer: "A stuffed animal that my boyfriend got me at the grocery store."
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Tech Support: "What operating system are you running?"
Customer: "Pentium."
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Customer: "My computer's telling me I performed an illegal abortion."
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Customer: "I have Microsoft Exploder."
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Customer: "How do I print my voicemail?"
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Tech Support: "What does the screen say now?"
Customer: "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
Tech Support: "Well?"
Customer: "How do I know when it's ready?"
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Customer: "I have a long distance modem."
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Customer: "I don't have a space bar."
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Cyberlord
HV Guru
liitunud: 02.12.2003
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04.02.2004 15:02:29
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Kuigi selliseid tekste on netis lademes, paneb inimeste lollus ikka ja jälle imestama
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Kommentaarid: 546 loe/lisa |
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argo
HV kasutaja

liitunud: 15.12.2002
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04.02.2004 15:48:04
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tsitaat: |
Customer: "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
Tech Support: ?@#$ < mailto:?@#$ > ?
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Väga hea tegu et selle siisa panid ikkagi ..
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Kommentaarid: 22 loe/lisa |
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Elof
HV Guru

liitunud: 07.05.2003
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04.02.2004 16:12:34
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tsitaat: |
Customer: "My computer's telling me I performed an illegal abortion." |
Alguses arvuti lihtsalt ülbitseb, varsti tekib AI, ning siis pole juba kaugel ka Terminator III
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Kommentaarid: 212 loe/lisa |
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tanelp
HV kasutaja
liitunud: 28.08.2003
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04.02.2004 16:37:42
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t2iega naljakas, ma naersin küll ikka p2ris k6vasti.    
tsitaat: |
Tech Support: "What type of computer do you have?"
Customer: "A white one."
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see on minu arust parim
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Kommentaarid: 4 loe/lisa |
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Negative
Kreisi kasutaja

liitunud: 18.09.2003
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04.02.2004 17:27:36
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tsitaat: |
Tech Support: "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"
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Parim IMHO
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Kommentaarid: 49 loe/lisa |
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Caveman
HV veteran

liitunud: 20.08.2003
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05.02.2004 23:45:47
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tsitaat: |
Customer: "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to print a document, but the computer won't boot properly."
Tech Support: "What does it say?"
Customer: "Something about an error and non-system disk."
Tech Support: "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"
Customer: "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel inside." |
IMHO
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Kommentaarid: 74 loe/lisa |
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itimees
Kreisi kasutaja

liitunud: 20.02.2002
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06.02.2004 04:34:21
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need juhtumised on vist siit pärit. see link peaks olema siit juba läbi käinud..
_________________ Kunagi pole aega korralikult teha, aga alati on aega ümber teha |
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Kommentaarid: 88 loe/lisa |
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kotmarjak
HV Guru

liitunud: 11.12.2003
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07.02.2004 00:08:41
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lademetes küll, aga arvatavasti on kõik ameerikas tehtud. on ikka lollakad hamburgeri õgijad küll
_________________ Ole tore ! |
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Kommentaarid: 144 loe/lisa |
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fredd
Kreisi kasutaja
liitunud: 03.12.2003
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07.02.2004 11:09:14
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itimees kirjutas: |
need juhtumised on vist siit pärit. see link peaks olema siit juba läbi käinud.. |
ei ole sealt aga usun, et seda sama teksti on igalpool
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Kommentaarid: 31 loe/lisa |
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Max Powers
liitunud: 21.03.2003
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07.02.2004 11:11:33
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A Friend: "There's an icon on my desktop that won't go away."
Me: "Did you click on the icon once and hit 'delete'?"
A Friend: "I haven't tried that yet."
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Kommentaarid: 215 loe/lisa |
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Taun0
HV veteran

liitunud: 22.07.2003
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11.02.2004 00:56:26
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see kõige esimene on jah, parim !!
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Kommentaarid: 67 loe/lisa |
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reimers66
HV Guru

liitunud: 07.03.2002
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11.02.2004 01:03:42
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pole nagu väga naljakas kui arvesse võtta kui palju inimesi leidub aga nohh mäletan isegi kui esimese arvuti 386 ostsin ja küsiti siis et
mis arvuti on ma vastasin rahulikult et COMPAQ
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Kommentaarid: 65 loe/lisa |
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HDD
HV veteran

liitunud: 24.09.2003
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11.02.2004 01:08:46
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see on hea
tsitaat: |
Tech Support: "What type of computer do you have?"
Customer: "A white one."
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_________________ The funniest thing about this particular signature is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything it's to late to stop reading it  |
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Kommentaarid: 62 loe/lisa |
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arm2004
HV Guru

liitunud: 20.05.2003
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11.02.2004 01:10:14
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Caveman kirjutas: |
tsitaat: |
Customer: "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to print a document, but the computer won't boot properly."
Tech Support: "What does it say?"
Customer: "Something about an error and non-system disk."
Tech Support: "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"
Customer: "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel inside." |
IMHO  |
aaamen
_________________ nooope! |
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Kommentaarid: 110 loe/lisa |
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one
Piiratud kasutaja

liitunud: 26.06.2003
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11.02.2004 08:27:52
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Taun0 kirjutas: |
see kõige esimene on jah, parim !!  |
jah
_________________
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